Kin

~

Secret

this will be the one

the last time we witness

the belief, wonder and trust,

acceptance of the myth 

we’ve perpetuated

gladly each year,

whilst we watch the

wonder in those blazing

saucer eyes,

this year we know

the bubble will burst

and with it the first 

crack in her naivety,

leaving us to bleed

knowing she will never 

fully trust us ever again

(2022)

*

Utah or Bust!

we flew to Utah yesterday

Beatrix decided we should go

so, we made some paper passports

and boarding cards to show,

then sitting on the staircase

one behind the other

grandma became cabin crew

to sort out any bother,

like suitcases, snacks and stuff

or blocking up the aisle,

she made us very comfortable

it was going to take a while, so

she showed us the life preserver

that looked suspiciously like a bra

and pointed out the exits

thar and thar and thar!

eventually we landed

tripping off the bottom stair,

to the living room for duty-frees

selecting them with care

from the fireside ornaments

old magazines and stuff,

until the clock struck midday

Beatrix had had enough, so

we climbed back up the fuselage

and tottered along the wing,

down to kitchen baggage claim 

with a sprightly spring,

we’ll be keeping all those documents

for our next exciting version

of Beatrix’s staircase aeroplane

and her next pretend excursion,

we’ll travel free around the world

with her global boarding pass 

and Beatrix’s imagination

Staircase Airlines 

Business Class

(2019)

*

The man I am

I knew my father

the father, not the man

so, I write 

that they will know me,

not me the father 

me the man, 

the man I am, 

somewhere 

amongst the words

the words I can never 

say out loud, albeit 

wish I could, 

there I am 

word for word

letter by letter, 

a man waiting

to be assembled

piece by piece

*

Linger

recently, after a friend’s funeral

you turned to me and asked

‘if I died first what would you 

keep of mine, what would you miss?’

wrong-footed, I couldn’t answer, 

‘ten bob it’ll be me goes anyhow’

was my hasty quip,

but afterwards I did think,

long and hard, deciding

it would be your smell

I’d be lost without, the 

subtle trace of perfume 

on your pillowcase.

indelible as a fingerprint,

closer than your smile, 

yes, that’s it

I’d miss the smell of you

*

A shred of Life

I shredded another box

of your stuff today

formal papers, business stuff

old bank statements and such

nothing very personal,

sitting there, whilst your affair

slid through my fingers

falling like snowflakes into

the angry whirring cauldron

ending life as cross-cut chaff,

I’d already decided that

it was going into the bottom

of a trench, beneath manure

for this season’s runner beans

chaff and horseshit

turned into fresh vegetables,

only one lucky escape

saved from this cutting fate

a neatly folded, important

looking fire insurance policy

from the Prudential dated

1949, priced 4s 6d

and it really made me think

it wouldn’t even be enough to 

buy a box of matches today!