sobering nay humbling

I aim for a straight line

a mark on the facing wall

a steady horizon

hoping my legs are strong enough,

confidence is an unbalanced scale

weights move randomly

pan to pan, a puckish trickster

waiting to applaud my fall,

but I see your faces, hear your voices

feel the strength of your love

you who have all stepped to the plate

and so must I.

*

© Graham Sherwood 07/21

(A trio of poems concerning the JR hospital Oxford)

I know she cries when she leaves 

she doesn’t know

I see her reflected in the corridor window,

it’s seeing me wear pyjamas in the daytime

and knowing how I hate it

she knows duvet days aren’t my style 

the last thing I would do,

but it’s part of this captivity 

the gentle chord that bonds

that says you do not have control,

so I break the day into hours

keep busy and tell myself

not to sleep in the daytime

*

© Graham Sherwood 06/21 

the daytime buzz of this place

has quietened to a soporific hum 

traffic has gone home

no visitors remain

but the nurses continue,

in the dark I wonder 

who else could be awake

eating houmous and crackers

at 2am

*

© Graham Sherwood 06/21

There is life is here and sadly 

so too, that heinous demon death,

amongst the tumult the clatter, the 

bongs beeps dings and hums

there is a gentle grace,

they move serenely and do their job

incognito masked, with values shared

from passive cleaner to the knowing 

expert in his field, 

the chatty landladies who change the beds,

the studious nurse dispensing pills,

the coat hook where one’s dignity hangs

as I am toileted like a child,

but within this microcosm

I am the undeserving star,

I am cut and neatly sewn

on the poulterer’s slab

not dead, lucky to be given life

in a game I had to win

*

© Graham Sherwood 06/21

who knows from where comes
this mischievous entity,
the musical daemon announcing unheralded
lyrical riffs, pressing selector buttons
perfectly lettered and numbered,
so the jukebox in my head begins
to spin involuntary chords
strumming intros, heartfelt lyrics
unheard for ages, like zephyrs
breathing in and out, with
the brevity of a smile,
the reminiscence of that place
the perfume of that beautiful girl
the madness of that summer
it will never let you forget

*

© Graham Sherwood 06/2021

I speak for myself

thinking not to coerce, induce 

or persuade 

words are offered freely

one opinion singular 

fragile unchaperoned

so why are my words deemed

dangerous virulent abrasive

they were  not sent to you

painted on your wall

spoken to your friends family lover

branded on your skin

but your indignation binds me

imprisons my freedom

you a litigant bruised easily

by feathered phrases are

jailor to my free words

temporal terrorist to my thoughts 

the hate you seek from me

lives within yourself

*

Graham Sherwood 05/2021

split consciousness

I’m dreaming and I know it

like watching myself in a film

never in colour, strictly monochrome

one camera, static, a single exposure

the consciences merge

permitting noises to infiltrate my dream

a persistent rap, a rhythmic tap

letterbox, door knocker, a woodpecker 

outside on the cherry

but the tempo is too slow

the dream vaporizes, I wake

the knocking remains, real

I can’t see straight yet, 

or swallow properly

and I need a piddle,

shuffling back to the window

I see the drummer

a Great Tit

hacking fruitlessly at the tit box hole

cut small to fit his cousin

I smile admiring his tenacity 

shake my head pitying his stupidity

but who am I? A sarcastic voyeur 

to chide him the tenacious slayer of dreams

*

© Graham Sherwood 05/2021

after lunch, a tagine

we dodged the showers

to see if the cricket was on

no sign of play, even though the sun shining

just a lap of the boundary

you resting at every bench

as usual

nearly home on the way back

we both rested on the village green

to chew the cud in the dappled light 

on a yew bench dedicated to a dead man

watching three young girls

taking selfies 

oblivious to the wet grass

our thoughts racing back to 1968

we had a heart to heart

both dancing around the potential 

poor outcomes of impending surgery 

without making eye contact 

both of us staring at a boat

about to disappear over the horizon

*

© Graham Sherwood 05/2021

the new runner bean canes are up

a tilting naked guard of honour

saluting themselves unceremoniously

across the empty raised bed

the allotment looks season ready,

tomato wires too have been tightened

and whistle a little in the breeze

but the plants are a fortnight behind,

robins, wrens and tits explore

these new vantage points

now the soil nets are off,

it’s time to face east

hold the pale Muscadet libation aloft and toast

new growth, new crops, new hopes

*

© Graham Sherwood 05/2021

were these the last words I write

the first would be the hardest

I would recall the very first sight

the serious girl, aloof, elegant

I thought you beautiful

and far too fine for me, then

our first rendezvous on the lawn,

you a settled fawn, intriguing, quizzical

while I foolishly filled the silences,

and after all this time, 

some fifty years or more

you might capture my eyes

and still know

I need not speak one word

*

© Graham Sherwood 05/2021